Well, the spooky annual holiday event that is Halloween has reared its monstrous head yet again, which means celebratory parents everywhere will soon be carving scary, demonic faces into their newly purchased pumpkins (unless they buy them pre-carved, lazy so-and-so’s). But hey, here’s a fun idea: instead of carving a ghastly and ghoulish monster onto the surface of your jack-o’-lantern, how about skilfully sculpting the handsome face of everyone’s favorite self-centered cartoon secret agent? [Read more…]
Twittersphere Blasts NBC’s Whitney
The Twittersphere has developed a new Thursday tradition: bashing NBC’s abhorrent new sitcom “Whitney” until it draws blood. Since each and every tweet trashing “Whitney” is 800-1,000 times more amusing than anything that has ever appeared on the trauma-inducing sitcom, we thought we’d feature some of our favorites:
The Ten Best Moments in Mystery Science Theater 3000 History
“Mystery Science Theater 3000” codified what people had been doing for years: vastly improving bad movies by making fun of them. It somehow stayed on the air for eleven years and defined a decade of popular culture, mostly by bringing bad movies back to painful, hilarious life. MST, we salute you, by honoring your ten greatest moments. [Read more…]
The Lethalist Warrior
Spike TV has a show entitled the Deadliest Warrior, in which they essentially play the game of “Who would win in a fight between Batman and Superman?” with high tech computers, experts in the field of blustering and puffery, and actors pretending to be some of the greatest fighters in history. I normally watch the show simply for the staged fights at the end, which I always get a kick out of (after all, where else are you going to see a knight in shining armor fighting a pirate?) But I also decided that, since the show is essentially full of crap (in what universe do Soviet Special Forces defeat Green Berets? Have they never even seen an action movie?) I could do it too. So, here is the pilot episode of the Lethalist Warrior, the show where we decide who would win a fight between two action figures. It’s time to decide
WHO
IS
LETHALIST?
(Just try to imagine the narrator from 300 saying that. It will be better for all concerned.)
The Six Wives of Henry VIII – A Beauty Pageant
Good evening TV viewers! Actually, that’s not technically true, since this isn’t airing on TV, even though it’s a beauty pageant, and they’re always on TV and they promised that this would be on TV….I WANT TO BE ON TV!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sorry about that, I had a moment. I’m Ryan Seacrest, and this is the First, Last, and Only Wives of King Henry VIII, king of England, Ireland, and France Beauty Pageant, sponsored by Coca-Cola and presented by Pepsi. [Read more…]